Non-linear checkin

I have virtually nothing to say except I am quite contented.

I just didn't want to leave y'all thinking I was uber depressed. But, I think that is alright. You can handle it, yes? I was just feeling.

And loving a friend. 

Full of music.

Heart confused, but delightfully.

I think?

I certainly feel sassy. More every day infact.

Brain in an immensely productive space.

I go on these epic batch-processing kicks where I can barely sleep with my excitement to accomplish. You should see how clean my house is, and how large and scratched out my to-do list is.

Seriously... if you come over I'll show yee.

I am posessed by music and do-gooding.

MwahahahaHAH!

Do you ever wonder what percentage of your do-gooding is for spectacle?

In part my being sad in my last post was to... be sad. And tell y'all. 

Sometimes I am bad at letting myself be sad.

It takes me so long to realize my body is waiting to be physically sad, and it weighs heavy... and once I cry I feel immensely light again.

I love my family and hanging out with them.

I am a blessed lady. And I kind of hope that, though we are all oddballs in my family, people can always see where I came from in my lovely family. I would hate for people to not see how alike we are. They are that of which I am made!

I wonder sometimes if I am just getting older or becoming straight edge.

I am still a glutton and a hedon, but somehow there is limited appeal in being an inebriated douche bag. Who would have figured?

I like getting old.

I can't wait to be an old lady.

And get enough of a hormone imbalance to have a beard.

I was telling my friend Katie about this and she sent me a message once I left her house:

"Love you and your music, and your future beard! you viking Maiden!"

Once you are fifty, I think you should go balls-out with style.

Why couldn't I have a beard and be proud of it? OWN my beard.

Robertson Davies loved bearded ladies.

I think I would even dye it rainbow to be certain it was not subtle.

I also have fantasies about tattooing my whole body once my first grandchild is born. Just... you know, for a curve ball. Nanna Feltham is coming to getcha!

My sister once claimed that people who were not raised by old ladies often don't even see them. Like they are invisible.

There is a lot of power to being assumed boring, or a stereotype or invisible... you can subvert so many ideas and use your assumed and real wisdom to blow minds.

I am so pumped to be an old lady.

Be I lucky enough to get there.

This is certainly a pointless post.

I hope you see further the geography of my mind.